Crush : Part 5

(…Continued from Part 4)

I knew she was ignoring me.

We no longer met, so there was no question of asking that in person. Even my planned bumping-into-her-at-the street attempts failed.

I sent a couple more messages which looked more like the emails you wrote at work. To the point.

‘Hi!’

‘How are you?’

‘Good.’

‘Great!’

And days later she stopped replying to messages altogether. Nothing at all.

I felt like telling her.

I felt like typing out a long message – about how I always wanted to know more about her and how I liked the way she smiled, the way she looked exactly the same way as one of my previous crushes did – the one I saw at a college fest and then found half of freshman year searching. I wanted to tell her how much I loved being a friend of hers. I wanted too tell her how different she was from the rest of the crowd.

But as all other great lovers did, I typed out the message, all my feeling overflowing, and just deleted it.

Every time I walked by her lane, I wished I would run into her. But that never happened.

The passion that I had for her began to be a burden that I would carry everyday. And it just got heavier with every passing day. It is tough to live life with that holding you down.

I left it at her doorstep and promised myself that I would never go back again.

I stared at her display picture everyday, resisting myself from sending another message.

And if you give me a choice, even today, I’d still avoid taking her lane.

Some crushes don’t make it to love. They were, perhaps, never destined to happen.

And I will never know if she liked me back.

Thank you very much if you made it until here!

Do let me know how you felt it was in the comments.

In case you haven’t read the other parts, feel free to go back and start over!

Thanks again!

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